Betty White Round-Up Game 3: Howie is Sexually Attracted to Jorli's Mom

What a game! Definitely wasn't our cleanest or finest outing. But it was fun. Aside from a few miscues we played pretty great. Best of all we have some fun stories from the game and the bar. Please see the highlights after the jump

1. Howie made an unexpected appearance and was as charming as ever. He tried to get in on some Ms. Cook love action, which was sweet and very creepy at the same time. It was all in good fun I suppose, but after a few drinks some good fun can become a questionable decision which can then become a night of intimacy with Howie. Well - I suppose Ms. Cook could do a lot worse. And if she goes down this path, I have no doubt that we can all be expected to provide the love and support that Ms. Cook needs. And if we're lucky, maybe Jorli will get another brother out of it. Of course that means that Mateo will be older than his uncle. Think about it.

2. Allyson did not get into any double plays in the game. And Allyson correctly tagged up. How about that: a newly minted lawyer and it only took her 3.5 months to figure out one of the basic rules of kickball. But in all seriousness congratulations. It is tricky. It took me 2.5 months to train Coconut how to do the same thing.

3. Ann put on quite a performance on the field and at the bat. She is now our superstar sub in case we are short on players. Plus she was a welcome addition to the bar scene.

4. Now it's time for our bone head plays of the day. There are 2 front runners and I'm not sure which was more remarkable:
A) Shawn, who supposedly has opposable thumbs, could not catch 2 balls kicked right at him. It was an extremely impressive display of retardation. The retard doctors that work day and night examining retards from the world over would love to get hold of Shawn who seems capable of living a normal everyday life. But we were wrong. There are some serious chromosomal things going on that should be examined by a team of retard doctors who might be unable to unlock the retard gene.

B) Yipper's play was possibly even more extraordinary in its sheer inexplicableness. And Yipper has done some inexplicable stuff: getting beaned twice in one game for lolly-gagging around the bases and trying to get an out at 2nd when nobody was coming from first. But this might take the cake for Yipper out-Yipping himself. I think Yip goes into "shutdown" mode in which his mental capacity goes into a state of recess. This might be some higher order evolutionary thing which allows him to take rest while maintaining productivity and allows him to make really crap kickball decisions.

5. We had homeruns from Yipper and a grand slam from White Dan. And I think from Henry as well.

6. Albert showed a remarkable ability to kick the ball 15 feet in the air and 10 feet far every time.

7. Has anybody noticed how unbelievably quick Linette is? She gets around the bases faster than Lauren picked up Matt. It is remarkable.

Please add on if I missed anything.